When Stewie picks up a splinter from the old staircase, Lois decides to replace it. However, Peter can’t keep his footing on the slick wood and constantly falls down the stairs. When Peter finally gets tired of falling down the stairs, he moves into the bedroom permanently until Lois has the original stairs returned. Meanwhile, Opie is fired from the Pawtucket Brewery and Peter’s new co-worker named Stella is deaf. After Quagmire meets her, he is inspired to have a disabled ladies night at The Drunken Clam. Brian isn’t impressed by the pickings but decides to try his luck with a normal-looking girl at the bar. Brian cuts to the chase and asks her out and she agrees, telling him her name is Kate whom he later finds out is blind. After a pleasant date at the movies, she shrugs off his suggestion to join her in bed but starts to kiss him goodnight when one of the neighbor’s dogs start barking and she confesses how much she hates dogs. Brian manages to excuse himself without kissing her goodnight.

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When the family plans a surprise party for Meg’s 18th birthday, the only person to show up is Quagmire but his intentions to seduce Meg become quite clear. However, when he leaves without incident Peter lets it pass. Quagmire continues to flirt with Meg and talks her into going out with him. When Quagmire shows up for their date, Peter objects but Lois allows her to go out with him, telling Peter it’s just a ploy for attention and she’ll rebel if they try to stop her as Lois herself did against her father. After their date where Glenn fails to score but considers it just a temporary setback, he arrives in his home to find Peter waiting for him. Peter orders him to stay away from Meg but Quagmire points out that she’s 18, legal and ripe for the picking and Peter vows to stop him.

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It’s winter in Quahog, and Lois’ parents, Carter and Babs, take Stewie away on a trip. But when Carter falls asleep at the wheel, he ends up in the hospital. When Joe comes to take away his driver’s license, he wonders what he’ll do about his work. Babs and the family talk him into taking retirement. The guys and the Griffins suddenly find themselves stuck with Carter hanging out with them. Peter and Lois convince her parents to move to Florida to check out retirement communities, but after looking things over Carter refuses to consider living there until Peter talks him into giving it a shot for one day. After Peter takes him shopping and playing bingo, Carter comes to like it and the Griffins leave Carter and Babs behind and return to Quahog.

Six months later Lois gets a call from her mother that there is something wrong with her father. The family rushes back down to Florida to find Carter listless and unresponsive. While Lois and Babs worry, Peter hits on an idea of taking Carter back to his office at Pewterschmidt Industries Peter explains that his plan is to put some challenge back into Carter’s life and starts by issuing a series of instructions for the company until Carter snaps out of his funk and takes control again. Carter insists that he’ll never retire and they agree that they’ll never try to put him in a nursing home again. Just them Peter’s mom calls from the nursing home where she is to complain and tries to talk Peter into visiting for Thanksgiving while Peter remains non-committal. When he is finished, Lois makes sure she stays in the home.

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When former Griffin family neighbor Cleveland Brown returns to Quahog for a week, he visits his old friends Peter, Joe and Quagmire at the local bar. When Peter gets tired of his wife Lois constantly demanding for him to do chores, the group decides to take a road trip to New Orleans, Louisiana. While driving through a rural area in Georgia, the group is pulled over by a police sheriff, causing Peter to talk down to the sheriff. This results in the sheriff punching out one of their headlights, throwing away Joe’s badge, and planting a bag of marijuana in their trunk. He then takes the group to the county work camp where they are forced to perform various tasks including ditch digging and rock crushing.

Meanwhile, Lois, Donna, and Bonnie do some girl-like activity together where one of them involved tricking Brian into a bee costume.

As the guys’ stay in the jail supposedly comes to an end, the Warden then approaches them and tells them that their stay has been extended an additional thirty days. Another prisoner then tells them that his imprisonment was also extended and he has been in the jail for 45 years. Scared that they will also be locked up forever, they decide to break out of the prison once the prison guards’ eyes are diverted. Successful in their attempt, they soon come across a home, and discover a set of handcuff and shackle keys. They then find out that the home belongs to the Sheriff that originally arrested them. When the Sheriff returns home, Peter tries to pretend to be his wife while hiding in a closet, but he inadvertently jumps out of the closet and causes the sheriff to chase after them. The entire police force then comes after the group of friends, until they are able to jump on a train and and arrive in Quahog. The police force follows them, however, causing Joe to then reveal his own police force, and letting the group go free.

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The Griffin family decide to travel to the amusement park Six Flags, but when Peter is unable to ride the roller coasters because he is too overweight, he becomes disappointed. Peter’s two friends, Joe and Quagmire, then convince him to go on a diet in order to be able to ride the coaster. He is unable to lose any weight however, and simply decides to wear a girdle instead. The family then travels to Ohio in order to ride a new roller coaster titled The Holocaust. Able to ride the roller coaster, Peter gets on the ride, but it is unable to make it up the first hill, and falls under Peter’s weight. Deciding to return home, the car suddenly breaks down in Amish country, with no mechanic or any signs of modern civilization in sight. The family approaches the group of Amish workers and asks if they can stay in their village for the weekend. When Meg begins complaining about the lack of electricity, and other common devices, a local Amish boy, named Eli, decides to take her on a tour of their village. The two then begin to exchange kisses, but the boy’s overprotective father interrupts them, and instructs the two to never see each other again.

Meg approaches her father, Peter, about talking to Eli’s father to let his son date her, but when Peter tries to introduce him to music (in this case, “Highway to Hell” by AC/DC), he unintentionally turns the Amish community against him. They then demand that the Griffin family leave, who explain that they cannot leave until their car is fixed. The Amish then reveal that they have attached two horses to pull the car back to their home. Eli also decides to follow Meg, and the group then returns to Quahog. Later that day, the Amish follow the family to Quahog, and vandalize the Griffin’s home, resulting in Peter declaring war against the group. A battle ensues, with both sides equally matched. Peter and Eli’s father then begin to fist fight in order to settle the matter on their own, but when Eli stops his father, he tells him that he is truly in love with Meg. Eli decides to stay in Amish country, however, telling her that it is his true home, and the two embrace in one final hug.

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As the Thanksgiving holiday begins, Lois invites her family, and the neighbors over for a dinner in celebration. Once the guests arrive, they then begin eating their meal, when suddenly another guest arrives at the door. It is revealed to be Kevin Swanson, the son of Griffin family neighbors Joe and Bonnie Swanson, whom they had presumed had died fighting in the war in Iraq. Overjoyed, they ask why the army had reported that he had died in action. Kevin then tells them a story that he was in a coma following a bomb that had been placed inside a turkey during Thanksgiving years before. Later, while having dessert, Kevin voices his distaste of the war, and reveals several inconsistencies about his time in Iraq. Kevin then tells his father that he had actually went A.W.O.L., and faked his own death in order to leave the war and return home. Joe, a police officer, then arrests his son for the crime of desertion, with the rest of the family criticizing him for lying about being a war hero.

Brian, the family dog, asks Kevin to explain why he deserted the army, with Kevin telling him that he had grown tired of the war, and had befriended many of the Iraqis, leading him to want to try to escape. Kevin and the family then begin fighting over the United States’s occupation of Iraq, with Brian protecting him, and several others, including Ida Quagmire, a war veteran, disagreeing with Kevin’s choice to desert the army. Angered, Joe then begins to take his son to jail and handcuffs him. Kevin then suddenly reminds his father of a time when he let a homeless man get away with stealing a can of tomato soup to feed his hungry family, who he had felt sorry for. Emotional and sympathetic, Joe agrees to let his son off the hook, and the two make amends. As the family goes to finish eating dinner, and the episode comes to a close, another man resembling Kevin Swanson enters the family’s home, saying that the other Kevin is an imposter. Peter then looks to the camera, and states that they do not have time to finish that story

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Meanwhile, Brian goes to pick up Stewie from day care. On the drive home, Stewie begins listening to the radio, and decides to stay in the car by himself to continue listening to his favorite song. As he begins to sing to the song, he becomes angered, and demands to appear on the television series Glee. He accidentally hits the stick shift, however, causing the car to move forward. Thinking he can now drive, Stewie decides to take the car for a spin later that day, after stealing Brian’s keys. Thrilled by the experience, he begins listening to the radio, and learns of a contest featuring concert tickets for Justin Bieber. Deciding to try to enter, he uses his cell phone, but becomes embarrassed and tries to hand the phone to his teddy bear Rupert. As he does do, the car begins to spin out of control, and crashes into a lamp post. Stewie then returns the car home, with the entire front of the vehicle completely destroyed. Brian soon discovers the damage, and immediately blames Stewie, who tries to deny his accusation. Brian then shows him that Rupert is still in the back seat, revealing Stewie to have been the perpetrator. Brian then tells him that he is going to tell Peter and Lois, to the dismay of Stewie, who begins crying. Afraid of being punished, Stewie decides to run away from home, and leaves a computer disc for Brian to play and learn about his plans to fly away from Quahog. Stewie then attempts to take the bus to the airport, but is dropped off at the wrong neighborhood. Consuela, the Griffin family’s former maid, then discovers him, and takes him home with her. Later, Brian is able to find Stewie, and tells him that he did not tell anyone about the incident. As the two attempt to leave Consuela’s home, she insists on keeping him, to the chagrin of Stewie who steals a nearby gun, and shoots her in the foot. The two then leave, and return home

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After a horrible night, Quagmire approaches Peter’s wife, Lois, about talking to Brenda about leaving Jeff. At lunch, Lois and Brenda begin talking about the situation, and requests that Brenda remove her sunglasses, revealing a bruise over her eye, to the surprise of Lois. Later, at the bar, Peter, Quagmire and Joe discuss the matter, asking if the police can solve the situation. Joe then suggests that the group have an intervention with Brenda, where Quagmire confesses that the sister he knew growing up no longer exists, and he wants her back. The two then embrace each other by hugging, until Jeff enters the intervention, causing Quagmire to tell him that Brenda has agreed to leave him. Frightened by Jeff, Brenda reveals that the two are engaged, and that she is pregnant.

Later that evening, Peter, Quagmire and Joe begin discussing possibly murdering Jeff, with Joe against the idea until Jeff beats Brenda for simply changing the channel on their television. The three decide to talk Jeff into a hunting trip in an attempt to kill him, and make it look like an accident. Having expected it, however, Jeff reveals his own gun, and knocks Peter and Joe out so that he can kill Quagmire in another part of the woods. Once there, Quagmire talks Jeff into fighting him instead, during which Quagmire is seemingly strangled to death. Jeff then goes to dig a grave to put Quagmire’s body in, until he hears a car start up, and sees Quagmire behind the wheel. Quagmire then runs Jeff over, smashing him into a tree. Peter, Joe and Quagmire return home the next day, and present Brenda with a forged note from Jeff stating that he has decided to leave her. Peter ends the episode stating that he wants to continue killing people, indicating his next victim to be Mort Goldman.

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As a hurricane approaches Quahog, Rhode Island, the Griffin family prepares for its arrival. In his own attempt to pass the time, Brian decides to use mushrooms, to the curiosity of Stewie. As the mushrooms start to take effect on Brian, he begins having hallucinations, and eventually cuts his own ear off. Stewie tries to help Brian by staying by his side and taking care of him, but Brian continues to hallucinate and perceives himself in a hell-like world where he is continually attacked by various monsters resembling the Griffins and Quagmire. Brian is eventually able to snap out of the hallucination before Stewie helps him down stairs to drink some water.

The rest of the family tries to pass the time by playing charades, and various other games, but are unable to keep themselves entertained and take out their frustrations on Meg. Having dealt with their abuse for years, Meg finally turns on them, starting with Chris for being a terrible brother to her. Tired of her outburst, Lois tries to tell Meg that she is simply taking her own problems out on everyone else, but Meg brings up her mother’s past, and tells her that she is far from the perfect parent. Meg also informs Lois that when she turns eighteen, she is considering never seeing her again. This reduces Lois to tears and pleads to Meg for forgiveness. Meg then confronts Peter who, unable to comprehend her insults, thinks that his daughter’s argument is amusing until she calls him a “waste of a man.” Within moments, Meg’s parents and brother turn their abusive criticisms on each other. Peter then runs away to his room crying, leaving Meg with Brian to discuss their family’s dysfunction. Meg then realizes that her place in the family is to endure the insults of others to keep them together. She then decides to apologize to her family, restoring their egos and opinions of her in the process. The family then have a group hug, and reconcile their differences.

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